BUSY!!!

This short sem starts with a busy life.

• preparing fro CDL (campus dodgeball league), 
• preparing for mid-term,
• managing time for revision,

didn't even get enough of sleep,
a tiring month.
really hope that this sem will really get a good result.


anyway, it still good to have fun with a bunch of cheerleaders~
kekeke~

It's New Sem!!!

It's been a long time since i updated my blog! wow, 3 months? 4 month?
Haha, not sure!! but is a great time since i made my new decision!!
[to drop up my medicine, and taking actuarial science]
Yes, i still can't put it down yet but i will still try to love this new course! A challenging one!! Always twist my brain with all the calculation. Last sem exam is the most exciting for me as i didn't take a real exam for almost two years, with all those mathematical terms that i forgot long time ago, with all the calculation that hidden back in my mind, i manage to recall them one by one. And the worse one is those 'accounting', never touch it since i ended my secondary school, four years till now! OMG!! It's so challenging!! Howewer, i still manage to do it!! Say YEAH!!!!

Although my result is not 'flying colour' as i thought, may be just take it as a new experience to me la!! Nevermind, i can do better next time.
I just manage to get:

B+ for math (76),
B for statistics (70),
A+ for accounting (89),
A for english (83),

and still one more unknow result..
Aim for CGPA 3.67, but end up max CGPA 3.625 (estimation). Haiz, just hope for a better grade this coming sem, 1st class honour is waiting for me!!!

A new sem. How it will be like? meet new friends? erm...
a girl friend? erm...
Hahahahaa!! just guessing around, hope it will be a good plan from God!!
Kekekeke~

MY AIM FOR THIS COMING SEM WILL BE 3.75!!!
COME ON!!! I CAN!!

NEWEST ME!!

the forgotten talents..

is been a long time since i ever touch my piano and drums..
these instruments do bring back me with lots of memories..
the fun time with my bands..haha~
and had accompanied me during my sad times..
a really sad one
i used to play my instruments whenever i not feeling good...
i do play it whenever i feel sad..
and whever i'm emo-ing..
this is the best way to express my feeling..
it does comfort me~
and this is the reason why i fall in love with music..
the best way to express myself..

what a wonderful memories..
but now..
this talents about to be faded away from my life..
and is a waste i think..
no more piano..
and no more drums..

it touches deep inside my heart..

it just came through my mind..

and i dont know why...

and i just wants to ask...

would you be the one who will still care for me eventhough i'm blind?

would you willing to change my life?

would you be in my life forever?

that's my decision..

at last...i make a decision..

i totally gave up my dream starting today..

and to take up another dream by now..

just as closing up my left eye and open up my right eye..

i will see a further future waiting for me..

and i know somedays later, i will open my left eye again..

and the future will be brighter

i will totally come back for you!

[if i could]

watch your talk..

a simple word do have lots of  meaning..
and it hurts people if they don't know what u meant..
we should always watch what we talk..
because if you don't..
you hurt them!

especialy when you are typing..
they wouldn't know what emotion you are in..
with just a simple ''!'' they will think you are angry!
i always hurt people with what i said and what i typed!
because i don't know what words should be use in a right place or to a right person..
and yet i always apologise for my foolness..
i know i did wrong and i hope for a forgiveness..

decision that hard to me..

when comes to decision, i really hate it!!

i saw this video on facebook..
is about a father who sacrifice his own son to save a train of people!
how great is the father!
if that little boy is your son, what will you do?
will you just sacrifice your own son?
or choose to sacrifice a train of people to save your own lovely son?

i asked my friend ''antoine''..
who will u choose?
he choose the boy..
i told him that he is selfish and i said i rather sacrifice myself..
and he said: if he were u, i will do the same..[i'll save you]
and he asked me: what will you do?
i stuned at the moment!
i can't think of any answer!
who will i choose?
for me, this is really a hard decision!
and i dont know what to do..
i'm sorry if i said you're selfish..
but i think i'm selfish too~
indeed this is a human reflection!

if the boy were you, i will save you too..♥
i'd make the decision!

sometimes, we ''human'' indeed are really selfish..
we cannot deny it!
because this is a real fact!
we couldn't affort to loss someone we love..

• let say, if you have choosen to sacrifice your own son..will you be happy for your whole life?
• let say, if you loss someone you really precious..
  will you be happy for your whole life?

but some's will say, if you had save a train of people, you will be more happy!
you save more lives!
people will be glad for you!

but still you loss your love one....
i couldn't affort to loss someone i love...

this is so called ''friend''...

Je vais t'écrire un message en français ^^

Tout à l'heure tu m'as dit que j'étais mignon haha
Je sais pas si tu as dis ça juste parce que tu savais seulement dire ça, mais ça m'a fait plaisir xD
Tu es très mignon toi aussi O.O
Je te manque ?
Toi aussi tu me manque :p
ça m'a fait super plaisir de te parler. J'espere qu'on pourra se parler jusqu'à très longtemps. Je t'aime bien comme ami, tu me fais rire.
Je t'aime beaucoup Dazz .... =/
Prends soin de toi !
Bisous ♥

this is a message from a friend of mine~
and i would like to say something to him!

dear antoine~♥
friends are indeed like this..
we will always thinking of each other..
taking care of each other..
and so, this is called ''friend''..
and honestly, what i said is truely sincere from my heart!
is just depends on how u mean it..
and of course i would like to have you as my friend too, you are a great  man!!
but rather making you happy, i would like you to take care of your self..
don't always stay late!
don't always skipped your sleep!
do't always skipped class!
don't always smoke!
this is so called ''friend''

i hope you dont mind i busybody here!
i hope you will stay happily and laugh always!
you looks better with your smile on your face!
Prends soin de toi !

et je vous aime toujours!!
Bisous ♥

decision..

road that had been walked for so many years..
dream that yet to come true..
just dissapear out of sudden!!
in a despair mood but yet life still have to carry on!!
start a new life with a new dream?
possible?
yet, it's an unknown~

but now, it's time to make a change!!

homosexuality..

i guess this topic is quite sensitive and interesting huh...
so, what do you think of it?
weirdo?
there are the same as us!!
for me, i will think that this is a kind of modern reflection!!
people tends to change themself to adapt to this urban concept!!
but may i asked you again, do you think this is right?
i guess no one will know the answer!
so let me answer you this question!!
i totally support to homosexuality as there are friends around me who are 'gay'..
as far as i see them, they are always get bullied by the people surround them..
there are always get teased by the people surround them..
people always have a misconcept towards them..

1. Oh!! you're gay? so you must be having lots of sex.
2. you're gay? do you have AIDS/HIV?
3. you're gay? when did you start being gay?
4. OMG!! you're gay!! don't touch me!! don't come near to me!! you have virus!! you're dirty!!

i think everyone will sure think of these in their mind!!
but do you know how much you hurt them?
had you ever asked them?
A FEW BAD APPLES CAN RUIN A WHOLE TREEE!!
people tends to jump into conclusion based on very limites experience/exposure/acknowledgement
sometimes i do feel that the song ''born this way'' by lady gaga is quite correct!
we should not treat them as 'allien'

so, shall we start to treat them as one of us?
yes!! we should!!

should be a happy day~

i guess it's suppose to be a happy day..
ya!! it should be!! went to Jogoya japanese restaurant!
having buffet...
first in my life time i guess~
haha! quite a nice place!
nice environment, nice food, n pretty waitress..
but..it's a bit too crowded i guess!!

start with a hot herbal chicken soup to warm up my stomach!!
cos i skipped my breakfast just for this buffet!!
come with an empty stomach so that i can eat more!! so far, this soup is quite tasty!! wanted to have one more..but end up just have one..
might get too full!!><

then continue with some tit-bits~

mashmallow with chocolate dips~

soft and sweet~

yummy!

guess you are drooling now!!

actually this is quite special!!

you all should try it at home!!

cheese and pepper hot dog is quite delicious too~

come with cheese first then continue with pepper!

crunchy and elasticity!!

haha!

like rubber i guess!!

green oyster and barbeque chicken!!

sweet and fishy!!

like usual, post some photo to update myself!!

comes with my favourite ''grill honey banana'', sweet and soft!!

cakes with green tea flavour, cheese and caramel....

followed by 'haazel daze' ice cream, with belgium chocolate and rum raisin!!!

what a wonderful day~

playing with the carrot~

end up with cocktail drinks~

see you till then!!

love you~



shall i?

cheerful!

a real characteristic of mine!

should i just be myself?

or is time to make a change?

to become a more mature person?

or to just become myself again?

erm..........

ermmm.........

i would like to be myself..

but..

would also like to change myself..

...

......

.........

birthday..

just celebrated my friends birthday..

and it reminds me of my birthday in pushkin..

that birthday..i always keep it in my heart!

the first birthday that celebrated with friends and in a foreign country, moscow, russia..

the memories that i had on that day..

is unforgetable..

included the moments..

the feeling i had..

the emotion i had..

everything..

everything will be in my heart..

still looking for that day..

still looking for the chance to be together..

looking forward..

looking forward to that day..

tyler..

to my dearest tyler:

just saw your blog...
and honestly i'm really being touched by what you wrote..
a friend that knows me by the heart..
a friend that knows what i like..
a friend that share my happiness and sorrow..
a friend that nice to gossip with..
a friend that even share my secret..
that is you...TYLER..
i have been with you 3 months..not too long and not too short..
and truely, you are the one who accompany me from the first to the last..
the friendship that we have..is something that cannot be express by words..
i appreciate this friendship and i know you will..
without a partner is not a big deal..
because i'm always there to support you..
without me to answer 'anatomy' with you?
you will be trained to be more confident in answering question!
without me to cook with you?
you will learned to be a better cook!
just to tell you that anything is possible..
don't always look down on yourself!
you are much more better than someone out there!
sometimes, i do think that you are smart!
and that is real..
but you always complain that we are better than you!
and that is not true!
because we all agree that you are better than us,
may be you just dont have enough luck on that particular day!
(what an explaination)
and honestly and truely, sincerely from my heart..
i love to have you as my friend!
thanks for being my friend!

等待

等待毕竟是残酷的。。
看着远在俄罗斯的同学门都不在线。。
猜想他们应该在上课吧！真的好像跟他们像以往那样大吵大闹的！
咳~已经不可能了！
现在的我只能通过网络的方式来得知他们的消息，显得有点无聊！
怀恋以前一起上学的时候！
怀恋以前一起煮饭的时候！
咳~过去毕竟已过去了！
就别想太多啦！
你们吖！也该上线陪我聊聊吧！
好想你们哦~

thanks friends..

a friendship that had just begin to fluorish..
i never thought it ended up so soon..
althought it was just a merely 3 months..
but the bonds that created between us..
is something that we cannot imagine..
is really something strong that holding us together!

if i were given a chance..

i will still choose to stay together with you all..

to study with you all..

to go to class with you all..

if i were given a chance..

i will still wants to meet up with you all somedays later..

having vacation with you all together..

because you all had given me such a sweet memories..

and till the last moments at the airport..

you all still accompanied me..

but all these are God's plans..

we cannot decide either..

but still..

i really glad..

i really glad that god had sent you all to my life!

you all are so wonderful!!

you all are awesome!!
remember what happended at the airport?
the tears that i falled..
is sincere from my heart..
because i never regret to know you all..
and i also believe that the tears that you falled..
is sincere from your heart too..
because we are true friend!

the memories that we had created together..
had became a past~
but 'they' will always remain in our heart..
just between us..
and i believe that..
and i always will..
and i purposely write a journal..
it's about my life in russia..
just to keep in mind that i have friends that always care about me!

for me..
you all are such a wonderful friends..
are lovely friends of mine..
thanks friends..

it's a day to be happy..^^..

is 20th!!

tyler first birthday in moscow!!

how do you feel, tyler?

after all we did to u!!

having fun after all?

suffer?

is ok la!

once a while!!

growing older is not a bad thing after all!!

your spiritually will become more mature!!

your thinking!!

your characteristic!!

but of course i prefer you stay childish!!

stay more playful!!

and so..

one thing i need to remind you,

i won't post any of your video up!!

but for them, i'm not sure!!

and one more thing is don't plan anything for my birthday!!

and you knew what does it means!!

i'm not looking forward to it!!

is 2 more days left!!

i need to think of these first before i can proceed toward it!!

ok?

keep smiling..^^

time..

it's been 2 month since i depart from malaysia..
and i still can't believe i'm here..
there is not much different here..
maybe i used to be independent,,
honestly,
i didn't feel homesick at all as my friends does..
haha!
may be this is one of the advantage of being independent all the times!
But...!!
the things i feel the differences is the weather!!
i like the weather here very very much!!
just because i'm a sweaty person?
it's a fact!
no one can change that!..^^

the other thing is that the tons of colloque!!
OMG!!
i can't stand it anymore!
a good result means what?
a good future?
better friends?
teacher's pet?
i don't know!!!
do i really need to sacrifice my sleep for it?
i think..
the answer will be 'YES'
no doubt!!!
no choice!!
and no objection!!
anatomy!!
i will in love in you as much as i can!!
and i will never forgive you for making me suffering that much!!

anyways, friends are always there!
i always believe this!
the sorrow and the joy!!
haha..^^
they will share with you..^^
as the time goes on,
you will find out that who is the 'friend'
that really care for you!!
the bunch of friends here!
i like it much!!
and ...........
let's fight together for our future!!..^^

being emotion..

being emotion is just like a part of my life in moscow..
who can predict when is that 'emotion' things coming?
no one else..but..I CAN!!
i can! because i'm the one who being emotion...

so, friends,,
i hope u all won't mind when i'm in a 'low' mood!
i know everyone's knows that i'm the kind of cheerful person,
but friends, i think i'm not that cheerful..
and this is the truth, not a lie..
sometimes i do feel like crying out..
sometimes i do feel like want to talk to you all about my feelings..
and sometimes i do feel like want to keep it for myself..
i can keep quiet for a few days if i am emo-ing..
and sometimes a week..
so that i can calm myself up..

so..
not to worry about me..
i can take care of myself..
and dont ever ask me why when i'm 'emo-ing'..
i will always say nothing though there is something..
and once,
thanks for your caring..
you all are such a good friend.
and i knew it by heart!